I thought I would post my beliefs on it.
First, I should mention that I was raised a Roman Catholic. I thought... I learned... that my religion was the one 'true' religion. Oh, some others were close enough, but 'we' did it correctly. Others had religions that were started before Christ and had not learned, or came from splinter groups off The Church and they were wayward, to lack a better term. Yet meanwhile, we were not regular churchgoers once I was past the 4th grade or so, and even before then it was more with mom than dad. Like a lot of families, I guess. We went to church on the holidays and the occasional sunday until I was close to middle school age, and although I went to a Catholic high school, the attendance at church was down to the major holidays.
Yet I remained someone who thought himself a Catholic.
Did we, did I, believe in all the dogma taught by the Church? No. Certainly some in the family more than others - again, as it is in most families. I knew their were the rules and laws demanded by God (Thou Shalt Not Kill, Thou Shalt Not Steal, etc.) and then there were the rules about lifestyle that were put in by the church (birth control, the death penalty, abortion, etc.). I knew the points and reasonings behind them (ie, basically a consistent belief that man did not have the right to 'play God' by deciding when to get pregnant and when not to, when to take a life and when not to, what was a life and what was not, etc.). But s a young and inexperienced man I was willing to accept more.
Things happen in life that change you: marriage, children, death, divorce. Each brings with it a new understanding of things, and also a questioning of things you previously accepted. But little things also made me more aware of differences within the Church. For instance, due to an hour's drive between my house and my (ex) wife's parent's home where she was living, she gradually ended up moving in with me prior to our getting engaged. When the time came and I proposed, we went to the church to set a date. The priest would not marry us when he found out we were living together. He wanted her to list another address. When I said I did not want to lie and list her parent's when she really wasn't staying there, he told me to find another church. Not another Church, just another parish. Pretty hypocritical, huh?
Later, I got divorced; I found out my wife did something I could not live with, and, despite 4 years of being 'separated' while living under the same roof (I moved to the couch and stayed there) I finally filed for divorce. I had not wanted divorce both because I was a Catholic and because I didn't want my daughter to got through it. Once I realized it had to be better than what she and I were going through, it was a done deal. I mention it because there really was no way out. Despite the Church saying 'There is no such thing as divorce," and "Let no man put asunder that which God has created", it takes two to make a marriage. Once again, the Church and I were on separate sides. And this time it would not 'go away' as i technically would always be 'married' to my ex. After remarrying a few years later, I realized that would be unrecognized by the Church and that meant we were not really man and wife. A few years after that we had a child. I suppose to the Church he is a bastard, right?
Anyway, I say all this to show how it is not really how I left the Church, but how the Church did not accept or want me any longer.
Then comes the scandals within the Church. Disgusting. [ see an earlier post on the Church and Pedophilia ]. And to realize the men who install themselves and their friends are judging me and you? The same ones who either perpetrated crimes against the most innocent in society, or looked the other way knowing it was being done, or kept silent? Or assisted in its continuing by not coming forward at the orders of church higher-ups? Or those higher ups, the ones helping to make the laws, acting like pimps by relocating the guilty bastards rather than excommunicating them and calling the police? They are setting rules that I should follow? Telling me that I am living in sin because I divorced and remarried? I won't even complete my next thought on them...
Anyway, that started my discussing The Bible and beliefs in God with friends. Some of other religions, some atheists, some very strong Catholics, some who have other beliefs. I am still not sure where I stand, but I am sure that whatever I believe is based on who and what I am at this moment as it is with everyone else. No one knows. Those that can prove there is no God cannot do so, only show areas of belief that can be questioned. Those that know there is a God and He is the one from their Book (Bible, Koran, whatever) have no more proof than any other - some just have fervent beliefs. One of them may be right, maybe all are in some way, maybe none are.
Myself? A few things I have pondered.... If there is only one God, then it can be neither male or female. For those who believe in Adam and Eve (who begat Cain and Able), where did the next generation come from? Hopefully God suddenly populated everywhere as I would hate to think our ancestors all can be traced back to an incestuous relationship, right? I'm sorry if this offends anyone, truly. It is not my intention. But I can't avoid contemplating these things because the Bible simply says to have faith. Once you realize some things contained n the Bible are put there by men with an agenda, you have to figure out which are and which are truly what you believe to be what God wanted.
I still believe in Jesus as Son of God. I still believe there is a Being who created all this and directed it in some way. Some sort of energy force of 'good' for lack of a better term. Positive energy. Do I believe it was created in 6 days? No. Do I believe that many of the biblical stories are the same as Greek or Roman mythology, attempts by early men to understand or explain things they did not know? Sure. Its pretty apparent, isn't it? But I do not think it all was blind luck or that it was happenstance. I do think there is some type of thought and plan, and if so there is an interest in the collective 'us' from whatever it is that God is. I think Jesus was an attempt by God to reach us in human form, a way we may better understand God. The problem is, I think it is like an ant trying to fathom nuclear power. We may try, and we may fool ourselves. But we cannot do it. Even for those truly faithful among us, how can we possibly accept our inabilities and shortcomings in what we have here on Earth, yet think we can possibly understand the motives of anything that could make a Universe?
How about the Devil? Horns and a pitchfork? Fire and brimstone? No, I don't think I do. I do believe that if there is 'good' there is bad though. If there is positive energy then there is negative energy, too.
What happens later? Who knows. When my father passed there were things that happened that cannot be explained. Not by coincidence, or by people wanting things to be true. Personal, I won't go into them here. Suffice it to say I hope each of you reading this becomes as sure as I that there is more beyond what we see and hear each day. I'd like to think we pass on and stay as we are for personal reasons: I'd love to believe I'll see my dad again, or meet my grandfather. But they were not perfect and then could not be in a place where only perfection is allowed, right? I don't know what happens when we die, but I do know it doesn't completely stop. What happens, I am not sure of though.
As there were teachings of the Bible that were obviously 'wrong' and accepted as such (ie, passages about slavery and women being unequal) then any argument about each and every word being directly from God was - to put it mildly - bull. Unless someone believes every single word in the Bible - from the stories about Adam, Eve, a snake, and an apple ... to those about putting two of every single animal on the planet onto one ship.. plus all the passages about vengeance, retribution, slaves, and women being inferior and second class... Unless someone believes every single word of it all (silly but consistent, in my view) then they are picking and choosing which to believe were God's words and which were words added by men with ulterior motives.
No one has any more right to their beliefs than any other person to theirs. And once that thought coalesced in my brain, it forced me to re-evaluate some stances on social issues. Now I look at them as what would help society most, not what is based n someone's religious teachings. Many times they are the same. Other times they are not.
Still nothing is etched in stone as I try to look at each issue individually, but I 'know' that science can explain how life is created, and how it happens, but not why. No one who sees their child born should think it is luck and chance. I know there is more than we can see, know there is something beyond. And I know I won't understand it until I get there (and probably not even then).
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